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Drowning Mona

I’ve met a couple of people who I could characterize as so despicable I’d be surprised if anyone who note their disappearance. But they likely have someone in their lives who love them for some vague reason. I’ve not had a reason to ask as my brain is full of enough stuff that I don’t need to waste the storage. But then there is Mona Dearly (Bette Midler) who may be the most detested female living in the small town of Verplanck, New York (characterized as the test site some years past for the Yugo car company). When her car brakes fail and she flies right off a cliff into a watery grave in the opening scene, Police Chief Wyatt Rash’s (Danny DeVito) suspicions are aroused after he learns the brake lines had been intentionally cut. Soon, suspects are popping up all over town. There is her husband Phil (William Fichtner) and her son Jeff (Marcus Thomas), both of whom hated her as much as the rest of the town. Jeff is in the landscaping business with Bobby Calzone (Casey Affleck), who Mona would verbally and even physically batter. Or how about the pretty, tough-spoken Ellen (Neve Campbell)? Or maybe the woman who waving an affair with both Phil and Jeff? Rona (Jamie Lee Curtis) is the plain-speaking waitress at the local diner who was envious of Mona’s family. Lots of suspects and lots of motives.


Director:  Nick Gomez
Writer:  Peter Steinfeld
Cast:
Danny DeVito -  Chief Wyatt Rash
Bette Midler -  Mona Dearly
Neve Campbell -  Ellen Rash
Jamie Lee Curtis -  Rona Mace
Casey Affleck -  Bobby Calzone
William Fichtner -  Phil Dearly
Marcus Thomas -  Jeff Dearly
Peter Dobson -  Lt. Feege Gruber
Kathleen Wilhoite -  Lucinda
Tracey Walter -  Clarence
Will Ferrell -  Cubby the Funeral Director
Paul Ben-Victor -  Deputy Tony Carlucci
Paul Schulze -  Deputy Jimmy D.
Mark Pellegrino -  Murph Calzone
Raymond O’Connor -  Father Tom Stowick
Lisa Rieffel -  Valerie Antonielli









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Dead Fish

I’ve had bad days. You’ve had bad days. We’ve all had bad days. Some bad days are worse than others. We cope, we overcome, we endure. We get past the. We try to make the best of whatever circumstances in which we find ourselves. But few of us have the kind of day that Abe Klein (Andrew Lee Potts) is having. It starts when his girlfriend Mimi (Elena Anaya) tells him that she is pregnant, he isn’t ready for this and she is taking the train to visit her mum who’ll care for her. She borrows his phone to make a call but is assaulted by a snatch’n'grab causing Abe’s phone to be switched with that of a button man, Lynch (Gary Oldman). After a call and on a whim, Abe takes one of Lynch’s contracts. He finds himself with a safe full of cash, a baked-on-weed buddy holding the gun and a target who may have a better offer to make but then there is the client who’ll be cranky if the hit fails. Sadly, Lynch, who has fallen in lust with Mimi, has followed Abe home to retrieve his cell phone.


Director:  Charley Stadler
Writer:  Thomas Geiger; Adam Kreutner; David Mitchell; Charley Stadler
Cast:
Gary Oldman -  Lynch
Robert Carlyle -  Danny Devine
Elena Anaya -  Mimi
Jimi Mistry -  Salvador E. Johnson
Andrew Lee Potts -  Abe Klein
Billy Zane -  Virgil
Terence Stamp -  Samuel Fish
Karel Roden -  Dragan
Susie Amy -  Hostess
Frances Barber -  S & M Prostitute
Cassandra Bell -  Sugar Waters
Anouska Bolton Lee -  French Prostitute
Trevor Cooper -  Charlie
Verena Gato -  Sunshine
Iddo Goldberg -  Thief
Julie Healy -  Rainbow









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The Devil Wears Prada

Who says fashion doesn’t influence our day-to-day life? Not Miranda Priestly (Meryl Streep) who lectures her 2nd-assistant Andrea Sachs (Anne Hathaway) on how she came to wear her blue sweater. Starting with an Oscar de la Renta show in 2002 who did a cerulean blue collection, through Yves Saint-Laurent and 8 other designers, into selected department stores and on down to the bargain bins, the blue in her sweater has been passed from one to another until it ended up on her back.


Director:  David Frankel
Writer:  Aline Brosh McKenna; Lauren Weisberger
Cast:
Meryl Streep -  Miranda Priestly
Anne Hathaway -  Andy Sachs
Emily Blunt -  Emily
Stanley Tucci -  Nigel
Simon Baker -  Christian Thompson
Adrian Grenier -  Nate
Tracie Thoms -  Lily
Rich Sommer -  Doug
Daniel Sunjata -  James Holt
David Marshall Grant -  Richard Sachs
James Naughton -  Stephen
Tibor Feldman -  Irv Ravitz
Rebecca Mader -  Jocelyn
Jimena Hoyos -  Lucia
Gisele Bündchen -  Serena
George C. Wolfe -  Paul









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A Dirty Shame

You’re too young. Mom and dad know best. Listen to your parents. You have no idea what you are doing. You’ll have to live with that if you keep it up. Parents are always to willing to offer advice. Even when you thought you didn’t need any. As I grew up, I found that sometimes they were right, sometimes not. Bit I also realized that they didn’t really know what they were talking about, it was just panic chatter. Most of it was guesswork. Some day, Caprice (Selma Blair), aka Ursula Udders, oft naked girl about town, will know that her parents Vaughn (Chris Isaak) and Sylvia Stickles (Tracey Ullman) had only her best interests at heart when they trap and handcuff poor Caprice in a family intervention. But for now, they just want to keep her from throwing her life away. So pharma is their only alternative despite the humping squirrels.


Director:  John Waters
Writer:  John Waters
Cast:
Tracey Ullman -  Sylvia Stickles
Johnny Knoxville -  Ray-Ray Perkins
Selma Blair -  Caprice Stickles
Chris Isaak -  Vaughn Stickles
Suzanne Shepherd -  Big Ethel
Mink Stole -  Marge the Neuter
Patricia Hearst -  Paige
Jackie Hoffman -  Dora
Nicholas E.I. Noble -  Weird Paperboy
Lucy Newman-Williams -  Neuter Yuppie Woman
Scott Morgan -  Neuter Yuppie Man
Wes Johnson -  Fat Fuck Frank
David A. Dunham -  Mama Bear
Dave Moretti -  Papa Bear
Jeffrey Auerbach -  Baby Bear
Susan Allenbach -  Betty Doggett






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Drop Zone

The new guy is always a target for fun and frolics. Sometimes the tormentors make a mistake. They pick on someone who is able to teach them a lesson in etiquette. Pete Nessip (Wesley Snipes) drops by a jumper bar and plops himself down at a vacant table. But it seems that table is the regular spot for a rowdy team who think they’ll teach him a lesson. Sadly for them, the fight is going badly until Jessie Crossman (Yancy Butler) intervenes to save them from having some appendage broken more than once.


Director:  John Badham
Writer:  Tony Griffin; Guy Manos; Peter Barsocchini; John Bishop
Cast:
Wesley Snipes -  Pete Nessip
Gary Busey -  Ty Moncrief
Yancy Butler -  Jessie Crossman
Michael Jeter -  Earl Leedy
Corin Nemec -  Selkirk
Kyle Secor -  Swoop
Luca Bercovici -  Jagger
Malcolm-Jamal Warner -  Terry Nessip
Grace Zabriskie -  Winona
Rex Linn -  Bobby
Robert LaSardo -  Deputy Dog
Sam Hennings -  Torski
Claire Stansfield -  Kara
Mickey Jones -  Deuce
Andy Romano -  Tom McCracken
Rick Zieff -  Mike Milton